Lynne Baab

Praying about the flow of time: Freedom from the fear of death

Lynne Baab • Tuesday April 1 2025

On Valentine’s Day, 1994, I got the flu. Two days later, I couldn’t breathe. A long diagnostic process followed. At some point, the lung specialist described to me the possible diagnoses, one of which was fatal. He had put me on a cute little oxygen tank, but my brain still wasn’t getting enough oxygen to think clearly. I misunderstood him. I thought he said the fatal lung disease was by far the most likely diagnosis.

It was a week before my next appointment with him, so I spent a week thinking I was going to die. It was an illuminating week as I pondered what I would regret if my life ended. I had moments of fear, but my 23 years of following Jesus had given me a level of trust that made me willing to face death if that’s where Jesus was leading me. The freedom from fear, most of that week, was palpable. Truly, Jesus did “destroy the one who has the power of death, that is, the devil, and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by the fear of death” (Hebrews 2:14, 15).

I recovered fully from that lung disease, but five years later, I had a similar experience. This time it was my liver, which swelled up. Hepatitis. But what kind? The diagnostic process involved a seemingly endless series of blood tests, following by an extremely unpleasant liver biopsy. This time, I didn’t misunderstand the doctor. He said it clearly. The biopsy indicated I had a fatal liver disease, curable only by a transplant, which would not be likely to happen.

So I spent another week thinking I was going to die. Again, the years of following Jesus made a difference. “To live is Christ and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21). I could live or die, and God would make that decision. For many moments of that week, I was able to draw on all the years of experiencing God’s goodness in my life. For a lot of the time, I was able to trust God and experience Jesus’ peace.

The reprieve came in a letter from a sub-specialist at the university who had looked over my records. The specialist wrote to my doctor saying that even though the liver cells indicated a fatal disease, I was missing a blood marker that always accompanies it. My hepatitis turned out to be an unusual reaction to a drug I was taking. I went off the drug and slowly got well.

In 2010, I walked the death road again. It wasn’t me this time, but my sister-in-law, Connie. It was not a misunderstanding or a false diagnosis, but an inoperable cancer that completely obstructed her bowel. Her lungs were failing, so she was gasping for breath just like I did 16 years earlier. Because of weekly phone calls with my husband, Dave, and because she longed for peace as she died, she came to know Jesus only months before her death. In his conversations with Connie, Dave often repeated Jesus's words about preparing a place for us and being the Way (John 14:1-6). God’s mercy was so great to Connie. Jesus gave her peace as she faced the end of her life on Earth and anticipated the joy of heaven.

Following Jesus makes a difference in dozens, if not hundreds, of ways. Freedom from fear of death may not be something we need on a daily basis, but when death circles around us, peace from Jesus makes all the difference. Truly, in Christ, we are freed from the bondage of the fear of death.

As we walk with Jesus to the cross during Lent, we can ponder the many blessings of Jesus’ death and resurrection. We are forgiven because of Jesus’s sacrifice, and we can let go of inner voices that tell us we don’t measure up. We can accept and forgive others, knowing Jesus died for them, too. We can approach God directly, with no need for intermediaries, because Jesus has opened a clear path into God’s presence. And because Jesus died on our behalf and conquered death in his resurrection, we can rejoice in those fantastic moments when we experience freedom from the fear of death.

Jesus, you destroyed the one who has the power of death. You freed those who all their lives were held in slavery by the fear of death. Help us rejoice in the moments when those words feel real to us. Help us cling to you when we experience fear. Fill us with your peace that passes all understanding.

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Next week: Arbor Day, Earth Day, and the connections with Easter. Illustration by Dave Baab: Dave with his two sisters, Connie (left) and Jinny. Dave painted this from two black and white photos. Jinny died in 2019 from a medical error, another story of a person facing death with great peace because of her faith in Christ.

You may enjoy:

• No matter what happens . . . (contains more of the story about my bout of hepatitis)
• Jesus: Freeing us from bondage
• Two common questions about the Sabbath

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Lynne M. Baab, Ph.D., is an author and adjunct professor. She has written numerous books, Bible study guides, and articles for magazines and journals. Lynne is passionate about prayer and other ways to draw near to God, and her writing conveys encouragement for readers to be their authentic selves before God. She encourages experimentation and lightness in Christian spiritual practices. Read more »

Lynne is pleased to announce the release of her two 2024 books, both of them illustrated with her talented husband Dave's watercolors. She is thrilled at how good the watercolors look in the printed books, and in the kindle versions, if read on a phone, the watercolors glow. Friendship, Listening and Empathy: A Prayer Guide guides the reader into new ways to pray about the topics in the title. Draw Near: A Lenten Devotional guides the reader to a psalm for each day of Lent and offers insightful reflection/discussion questions that can be used alone or in groups. 

Another recent book is Two Hands: Grief and Gratitude in the Christian  Life, available in paperback, audiobook, and for kindle. Lynne's 2018 book is Nurturing Hope: Christian Pastoral Care for the Twenty-First Century, and her most popular book is Sabbath-Keeping: Finding Freedom in the Rhythms of Rest (now available as an audiobook as well as paperback and kindle). You can see her many other book titles here, along with her Bible study guides.

You can listen to Lynne talk about these topics: empathy, bringing spiritual practices to life. Sabbath keeping for recent grads., and Sabbath keeping for families and children.

Lynne was interviewed for the podcast "As the Crow Flies". The first episode focuses on why listening matters and the second one on listening skills. 

Here are two talks Lynne gave on listening (recorded in audio form on YouTube): Listening for Mission and Ministry and Why Listening Matters for Mission and Ministry.

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"Dear Dr. Baab, You changed my life. It is only through God’s gift of the sabbath that I feel in my heart and soul that God loves me apart from anything I do."
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